His friend ask "Dale, what the hell happened to your face?""When the lady sitting in front of me stood up to sing the hymns, I noticed her dress was clutched between her butt cheeks, so, being poIite I pulled it out, she turned around and punched me in the eye.""Well, how did you get... read more


You are watching: What do you tell a woman with two black eyes

His roommate looks at him surprised and asks him how on earth it happened. The man says there was a beautiful young woman wearing a formal gown at the party, and he noticed that her dress was riding up the crack of her butt."Obviously", he said, "that"s embarrassing and I don"t want ... read more

A man stepped out of his house to go for his afternoon walk when he noticed his neighbor had two black eyes...


"Whatn" hell happened to you Frank?""Well, I was in church last Sunday and I noticed a lady in front of me had her dress stuck up in her buns so being the gentleman I am I reached down and pulled the dress free and she turned around and hit me between the eyes"he replied.The neighbor... read more
His boss noticing the pair of matching black eyes decides to pull him aside and ask him what happened."Jesus Dave, how did that happen?""Well Bill... There was a woman standing in line at the grocery store with her sundress wedged in her ass crack. So I pulled it out and she blacked ... read more

A man staggered into a hospital with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes, and a five-iron wrapped around his throat.


Naturally, the doctor asked him, “What happened to you?”“Well,” said the man,“I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, we both spliced our balls into a cow pasture. We went to look for them and while I was looking around, I noticed one of the... read more
He calls his parents and says “Mom, Dad! I was at church today and a woman gave me two black eyes!”His parents, completely flabbergasted by the start of they’re son’s story ask frantically “How did you possibly get 2 black eyes in church!??” Then the son replies “ Well the woman in the pew i... read more
“What happened to you?” asked the doctor“Well it all started when my wife and I were golfing and by accident she hit the ball into a cow field. When she went to investigate, I saw the ball in the cow’s ass. I went and lifted the tail of the cow and that’s when I made my mistake.”“And... read more
The guy explains “Well there was a woman sitting in front of me and I noticed her dress was stuck in her bum crack, so I lent over the pew and pulled it out and she turned round and hit me”. “That explains one eye.” The wife responds “What about the other one?”“She seemed so miffed that I t... read more
Old Joe comes into the bar, back from Sunday morning church, with two black eyes. Bartender asks, what happened, how did you get black eyes?Joe says, I was at the church, and I see this lady in the row front of me, her skirt stuck in the crack of her butt. I figured it must be uncomfortable ... read more
One day a guy comes home from church sporting two black eyes. His wife says to him, yo, what the heck happened to you? Guy says, I’m sitting behind this lady, and when we stand for prayers, I notice her dress is stuck up the crack of her ass, so I reach out and tug it out for her. She turns around a... read more
and the boss asks what happened. The man explains "You know how sometimes women get up from their seat and their skirt is caught in the crack of their ass?" The boss says "Yeah, what of it?" "Well, I was in church and when we all got up to sing, I saw the woman in the pew in fron... read more
A little boy with two black eyes walks into church one Sunday. The priest notices him and is very concerned. "What happened, my child?" "I was singing in the choir, Father, and I noticed that the girl in front of me had a wedgie. So I pulled it out, and she punched me in the eye." ... read more
Today, my aunt’s father passed away, after a long life and leaving behind a great family. He was a very funny man, and told me one of my favorite jokes of all time. I’m going to post that joke here; stay to the end, it’s worth it. RIP, Marcel.A man walks into his neighborhood bar and sits do... read more
His wife asks him how he got the black eyes.Man: Old Ms. Johnson was sitting in front of me during mass, when she stood up I noticed her dress was stuck in butt crack, so I reached out and gently tugged it out. She spun around, was really mad and punched me in the eye. Wife: that exp... read more


See more: Predict How The Following Equilibrium Will Respond To The Indicated Changes In Conditions.

A man walks into a bar and sits down with his buddies. His buddies look up at him a notice that he now has two black eyes that he didnt have earlier. So they ask him what happened.The man explains " well i was out at the mall today and i was riding up the escalator you see, and there was a w... read more